Naruto Truth or Dare: Edition 50
by Digital Demon
Summary: Yet another truth or dare fic. Cliche, yes. Funny... I hope so. But the one thing that we can all smile about is... no vampires.
1. So it Begins

**Hello, and welcome to Naruto Truth or Dare: Edition 50. This is Digital Demon, NOT 54,681. If you don't like THIS STORY, don't avoid 54,681's altogether. We're completely different people. He's a good friend that let me share his account since my mom won't let me have one. This is my first time so**, **please be nice. And for those just getting into Naruto, the names of the genin are for you. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.**

**Enjoy!**

**Chapter 1**

One day, all of the Konaha Genin (Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke, Choji, Shikamaru, Ino, Shino, Kiba, Rock Lee, Neji, Hinata, and Tenten ), Kakashi and Gai, were all sitting around in the Hyuga Mansion (and yes, Neji is odd in this one as well) with nothing to do.

"Wanna do a mission?" suggested Naruto.

"No, too much work." said everyone else in unison.

"How about a Connect Four tournament." suggested Ino..

"No last time me and Gai played it didn't turn out so great." said Kakashi.

**Flashback to bad Connect Four commercial reference**

"So, if I win, the score is 22 to 23 Kakashi." Gai proclaims.

"Eh." Kakashi sighs.

"Connect Four!" Kakashi exclaims.

"Where?" Gai inquires

"Here, diagonally." Kakashi says.

"Pretty sneaky sis." Gai croaks.

"What are you talking about? I'm not your sister." Kakashi says blankly.

**Flashback to bad Connect Four commercial reference ends**

"The scary part is two grown men playing connect four." Tenten states.

Everyone nodded in agreement.

"Why does Neji's room creep me out so much?" Rock Lee asks.

Shino replies ,"Probably because he has a stuffed unicorn Collection,

Neji takes a flamethrower and burns the unicorns.

"Men gone wild on his TV,"

Neji turns off the TV and shatters the DVD.

"And because he has pink wall paper that says 'I'm a pretty princess, now give me a hug!'"

Neji tears down his wallpaper, and puts up wallpaper that says "I'm a scruffy, tough, rugged, hardcore MAN, now give me a hug!"

"Hey! I know! Lets play truth or dare!" Naruto screams.

"Naruto, you actually said something smart for once!" Sakura says, feeling invigorated by the miracle.

They all agree, find a bottle and spin it. The first to be tortured is...

**End. **

**UH OH! So suspenseful. This one is a little dry on humor so read the next**

**chapter and you'll be pleased(I hope). Review, and be gentle.**


	2. Byakugan Secret

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.**

**One review (OOOOO). Its somethin. Anyway, the suspense ends now, lets see who gets attacked first. **

**Chapter 2**

It lands on...

Hinata.

Hinata, scared out of her wits, lets out a small yelp.

"Truth or dare?" Shikamaru inquires.

"Truth!" Hinata yelps in a frightened voice.

"Cough. Pansy! Cough" Rock Lee 'coughs'

Everyone thinks for a while, and then...

"I've got it!" Naruto says in excitement

Hinata gulps nervously.

"Stick a hot dog up your nose!"

"Why are you so stupid Naruto, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah , blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah , blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah stupid poop BLAH!" Ino states, and states, and states.

"Wait, no, I truth you..."

"You can't 'truth' someone to do something, it's not a verb, dunce." Sasuke states.

"Nyaah! Anyway, tell us why people with the demon eye don't have pupils." Naruto demands.

Everyone nods in agreement, but Neji leaves the room, since he knows what happens.

"Well, the truth is, we wear special contacts, because the eyes of a person with the byakugan Kekkei-Genkai have rather odd eyes." Hinata says shyly.

"Well, lets see what it is." Naruto says.

Everyone agrees.

"Fine, but you asked for it." Hinata says in a regretful tone.

He takes off the contacts and...

"AAAAAHHHH! IT'S AN EMPTY BOX OF RAMEN!" Naruto screams.

"NO! IT'S SASUKE WITH CLOTHES ON!" cries Sakura.

"NO! IT'S ME NOT COMPLAINING AND TAKING LIFE BY THE HORNS BY DOING WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO!" Shikamaru yells.

"NO! IT'S ME ON A DIET!" Choji yelps.

"NO! IT'S NARUTO WITH CLOTHES ON!" Sasuke Please insert loud noise adjective here.

"NO! IT'S SAKURA'S UGLY FACE!" Ino disis.

"NO! IT'S BUG SPRAY!" Shino Please insert loud noise adjective here.

"NO! IT'S A FLEA BATH!" Kiba Please insert loud noise adjective here.

"NO! IT'S THIN EYEBROWS!" Rock Lee you get the point

"NO! IT'S MASTER GAI'S EYEBROWS!" Tenten blahs.

"NO! IT'S KAKASHI BEATING ME!" Gai blahs

"I only see a hole." Kakashi says calmly.

"The Byakugan makes you see your worst fear if you look at them when you look at someone with out the contacts." Hinata explains.

Everyone feels embarrassed because they reveal all their worst fears which are all gay (especially Sasuke's ), except for Kakashi Sensei, who fears nothing because he's awesome.

"Well, whats your worst fear Hinata?" Gai asks.

"I'd ra-rather not say." Hinata replies.

"Well it's not fair that Neji didn't see his worst fear. Get him in here, HE NEEDS TO SEE!" Sakura declares.

"YEA" everyone else yells.

They drag Neji in and force his eyes open. Neji screeches in such a girly voice, everyone thought their eardrums would explode.

"IT'S THE NAKED WOMEN, THE BOOBIES ARE TOO OVERWHELMING! AH! GOD NO! PLEASE NO! MAKE IT STOP!" Neji screams in pure terror.

He stops after Hinata puts the contacts back on.

"I think we'll all neec therapy after this is done."Kakashi points out.

Everone nods in agreement.

They spin the bottle again. It lands on...

And now YOU see your worst fear! IT IS THE

**End of the Chapter**

**Review please! I think this one will do pretty good, but typing "NO! IT'S... over and over is really annoying, and probably annoying to read. I know it's short, but as long as it's good. And the "I truth you" comment is from the heart. YOU CAN'T TRUTH A PERSON!**

**_Digital Demon_**


	3. Shino's obsession

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto**

**And the next part is finally here! The everlasting suspense ends! I'm way to dramatic in these intros. Well, I've been noticing that an alright amount of people are reading, but not reviewing. PLEASE REVIEW! And FYI, don't say "He submitted 2 chapis in one day, he has no life." I pre-typed these and then my friend eventually let me share his account. Well anyway, here comes the next poor soul. **

**Chapter 3**

It lands on...

"Why do the authors ALWAYS STALL FOR TIME!" Neji screams.

" I think it's a cult." Sakura says.

Any way, it lands on...

Shino.

"Truth or Dare?" Ino asks.

"Dare." Shino replies in his I-couldn't-care-less-either-way-voice.

"Ah, I wanna go, give me anything, at all, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah." Ino says, and says, and says.

"SHUT UP!" Hinata screams.

How would they dare a guy that doesn't care about anything at all in the world? I mean, he almost never talks if the subject isn't bugs.

"I know! I dare you Shino, to eat one of your precious bugs!" Kiba exclaims in triumph.

Everyone is shocked at the dare. Shino eating a Kikaichu! Now that's intense!

Shino had a look of grief on his face(not like you can tell, he wears sunglasses and 80 of his face is covered by that damn collar). Could Shino actually attempt to do such a horrible feat?

"Fine." Shino says confidently.

He obviously thinks he won't feel effected by it. Man is he wrong.

He summons one and places it on his hand. He braces himself. He moves his hand to his mouth and...eats it.

Cricket

cricket

moo

"Soooooooo that's all?" Hinata says, confused.

"I'd expect a bigger reaction." Sasuke states. But it has not yet begun!

Suddenly, Shino starts to sweat. Then he starts rocking back and forth in a fettle position. Then he starts moaning in an incredibly dark sounding voice. He starts foaming at the mouth and has random spazams out of nowhere.

"Oh no. What have I done. I'm a cannibal. I'm a horrible person! I want my mommy." Shino says in a voice that sounds like the devils.

"Oh man, it's such a bad thing to do, but...but...THEY TASTE SO DAMN GOOD!

All of a sudden he summons hundreds of Kikaichu and starts eating them by the handful. Everyone was watching in sheer terror as he devoured hundreds of the beetles while laughing a sadistic and evil laugh.

In a little while(3 hours) he calms down. He had no idea what had happened.

"Was that crazy penguin tryin' to steal my teddy bear again? Stupid penguin, sneaking up on me when I'm drunk." Shino says in a dazed voice.

"No, you were dared to eat one of your beetles..."

But before Tenten could finish, Shino screamed "THEY TASTE SO GOOD MUST EAT!" It starts all over again. This time though, it's a lot worse. If anyone else would so much as pass gas, they'd be attacked. They wouldn't be killed though, just covered in beetles. When he stops, they hold him down and tell him not to do it again, but he just waves his arms and says "NO PENGUINS, IT'S MY TEDDY BEAR!"

Eventually, they ignore him and continue.

The bottle is spun, and the next victim is...

**End of Chapter**

**Shino is one crazy mo' fo'. The next one is on it's way soon. PLEASE REVIEW! And if you've noticed that my stories are short, they are getting longer, so by chapter 6, they should be pretty long.**


	4. Neji is GAY?

**Well it's Chapter 4, and it has 2 reviews and is on the favorites list of one person (who oddly, didn't review). I'm happy with that since A. It's my first fan fic. B. People are probably getting sick of truth or dare. And C. It's been up for 3 days. As long as one person likes it, I'm happy. Anyway, here comes...**

**Chapter 4.**

It lands on...

CRAZY MC CREEPY PANTS(A.K.A. Neji).

Neji smirks, knowing that his dignity couldn't be any lower no matter what after the description of his room.

Everyone was stroking their chins, thinking of a HUMILIATING thing to do. After a while they huddle and make a decision, although Sasuke highly disagreed.

"I dare you, Neji, my own student, to kiss Sasuke, on the lips." Gai proclaims, smirking.

Naruto gets the camera ready, Sakura starts crying, and everyone else waits.

Neji and Sasuke needed a moment to take things in, then, Neji lightly kisses Sasuke, they both throw up their organs, and die, and not a soul goes to the funerals.

HA! Just kidding! Neji actually JUMPS ON IT (Naruto, of course, puts on the song "Jump On It")! Naruto is flashing pictures, Gai is scared that he's training a guy gay that might overpower him one day and, possibly, Neji would "clean out Gai's brown eye with his hose fluids," if you now what I mean. This wasn't exactly a dare, this was more like a rape. But there is more.

The jonin try to break it up a couple of times, but everyone (except Sakura) say "The dare must go on!"

After the 23rd try, and 20 minutes later, Neji gets off, but Sasuke stops him and in a lover boy voice says "Oh, Neji don't leave! I'm Just gettin' started!"

Everyone raises an eyebrow. The boys laughed, hard. Ino and Sakura cried. Kakashi was now thinking the same thing as Gai, Naruto got rid of the camera and got a digital recorder, and the rest of the girls were studying what Sasuke "likes to do" if you know what I mean ( it's a very sexual chapter).

This was really odd to everybody. Naruto was psyched that he had Sakura (and any other hot girls for that matter), to himself. Sasuke was shocked to find himself enjoying being kissed by a boy. Neji was surprised that Sasuke wasn't resisting like most other kids would do. Gai was still worried for his virginity. Kakashi just kept reading make-out paradise (he got passed the gay thing).

Sakura and Ino were hugging each other, crying on each others shoulders (and thinking of sticking a kunai knife into each others necks).The rest of the Asuma Cell cooed.

The Kureina Cell just looked in a puzzled fashion (Hinata's worst fear was happening, sucks for her). The rest of the Gai Cell had no reaction, I mean, they knew this would happen, they know Neji and his, hobbies.

After a while they stopped, and by a while I mean 20 hours. Everyone went home , slept, and came back. Well everyone said there comments.

"HA! SASUKE'S GAY!" Naruto cheered.

"HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?" Sakura and Ino exclaimed simultaneously.

"That was...something." Shino comented blankly. (He was now 30 lbs. Fatter after the bug fit.)

"PLEASE DON'T CLEAN OUT MY BROWN EYE WITH THE LIQUIDS FROM YOUR HOSE, NEJI!" Gai pleaded.

"Well Sasuke, I guess you'll never revive the Uchiha Clan." Kakashi Said in a sympathetic way.

"What are you talking about, I'm a girl." Sasuke explains.

Smoke covers Sasuke, and then, out comes a Ssuke with pink hair, lipstick, mascara, and a pink jacket.

"Really?" Everyone proclaims.

"NOPE, I LIED!"

Sasuke drops the illusion. "I am gay."

Everyone else sighs (besides Neji, he makes kissy faces at Sasuke, and Sasuke replies in a giggle.)

"Man, what was with that, that was crazy, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah., I wanna be dared blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah." Ino compains, and compains, and compains.

"You know what, I dare you to speak in Spanish for the rest of the game." Choji demands

"Que?" Ino preguntases.

They move on.

It lands on...

**End of Chapter**

**This was just a pointless filler. It's still alright, but probably won't do as well. Review Please! And for all of your information, I'm in the progress of a new fan fiction. I'm still going to do this one (not like a whole bunch of people care), but I am starting another. The next one is coming soon I'll give you a hint who te next person is. In another fan fic, he/she is obsessed with cheese.**

**_Digital Demon_**


	5. Kiba Horror

**Hello everybody, it's time for the next chapter. Has anyone figured out the next victim ? Well, your about to find out.**

**Chapter 5**

It lands on...

Kiba.

He couldn't care what he had to do, as long as it didn't smell (foreshadowing).

Everyone tried to think of the best thing for Kiba. They thought hard and long, until...

"¡Me atrevo le a comer el queso del Limburger!" Ino says.

Everyone was confused. Not only did they not understand the dare, but who knew Ino spoke fluent Spanish. It took them 20 minutes to find out what she said (Babel Fish, they thank whoever made it). Any way, Shikamaru says the dare in english.

"I dare you to eat Limburger cheese!" Shikamaru states.

"Si!" Ino confirms.

Now Kiba was about to kill Ino, because Kiba's super smell made him hate smelly things (not like the foreshadow didn't remind you). When Naruto "played the tushy trumpet" Kiba just collapsed, but holding really smelly cheese up to your nose when you have super smell! That. Just. Sucks.

"Reallystigycheesemenoeat! Kiba says while holding his nose as they bring in the cheese ( his mind is being destroyed by the smell, hence the bad sentence).

"You have to, and no holding your nose." Gai says, with a sadistic look on his face.

"Ha Kakashi, if he doesn't do the dare I get a point." Gai proclaims.

"Why would you get a point, he's not my student. Are you actually finding every little thing that you can to get a point?" Kakashi interogates, not looking up from his book.

'Shhh, he's gonna do it!"

Kiba hesitantly lifts up the cheese, making faces of disgust as he does it. Everyone is anxiously waiting for him to bring it to his mouth. Akamaru is scampering around the room in pain, he has to endure it as well. Naruto and Shikamaru are holding Choji back so he doesn't eat the cheese and ruin the dare.

The cheese is up to Kiba's chin, his eyes are tearing and the smell is burning his nose hairs (literally, they all laugh as they see flares from the flames in his nostrils).

No! I must overcome the sell! Kiba thinks.

He relaxes himself and is bring the cheese ever so close. But he relaxes too much, and "passes gas." The mixture of the aromas make Kiba gag. Everyone else holds their nose in a mocking way.

Eventually, Kiba just takes charge and takes a bite. He throws up in his mouth, but chokes it back down.

"I DID IT!" He exclaims in triumph.

"Ningún usted no , usted tiene que comer la cosa entera." Ino says.

Shikamaru comes back with a translation 20 minutes later.

"She said 'No you didn't, you have to eat the whole thing.'" Shikamaru translates.

"DAMN, NO ONE ELSE GOT ONE THIS BADG!" Kiba complains, about to cry.

"Too bad, go." Kakashi demands.

"AHHHHH!" Kiba screams

He eats the whole thing in one bite and pukes, a lot.

"No, my hello kitty collection, ruined!" Neji sobs.

"There I did it." Kiba says nautiously.

"Fine, next."Sakura whines.

They spin the bottle.

It lands on...

**End of Chapter**

**This was rushed, badly. This was by far my worst yet. I'm not saying it sucks, it's just not as good.** **Review Please! (Gulp) **

**_Digital Demon_**


	6. BURN!

**Hello! I AM EXCITED ABOUT THIS ONE! I have a feeling this one will be great. **

**kakashi'sdaughter put an INCREDIBLY good dare in her review. If you like this one the best, give 60 percent of the praise to her, because she said the dare that made this chapter possible. Fellow Kakashi fans, get ready, it's..!**

**Chapter 4 **

It lands on...

Kakashi.

He glances up from his book for a second, then reads again.

"Tru..."

"Dare" Kakashi says in a bored voice.

Everyone thought hard, especially Gai. His face was turning into a cherry from the amount of strain on his brain. Kakashi yawned. He feared nothing (as told in chapter 2). He couldn't care less about what they say.

"I KNOW! I DARE YOU, KAKASHI, TO BURN YOUR MAKE OUT PARADISE BOOK!"

Rock Lee rors, beaming.

"OH LEE, ITS PERFECT!" Gai sobs, embracing Lee. This time though, he's sobbing hard, hugging for longer, and stroking Lee's hair (gay moment).

Kakashi looked like his head was about to explode. He NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, went anywhere without Make Out Paradise. He was on the virge of tears.

"Wha-what -di-di-did you s-say?" Kakashi stutters.

"YOU HEARS HIM, BURN YOUR BOOK KAKASHI!" Gai yells, still hugging Lee.

"I-I-I ca-can't, it's a part of m-me." Kakashi whines.

"I'm sorry Sensei, but you must." Sakura says sympathetically.

"Let's go to the living room, that's where our fireplace is(a duh :p)" Neji orders.

They all go downstairs, but they have to tie Kakashi up to make him co-operate.

"No! Waaaaaaaaaaa! My momy gave it to me for a prezent." Kakashi sobs.

"TOO BAD KAKASHI! HA HA HO HEE HO TEE HEE HO HA CHUCKLE HA!" Gai laughs, so hard it's a mixture of everything.

They give Kakashi his book, reminding him of his dare. Kakashi starts shaking, a lot. He starts sobbing, hyperventilating, and dry-heaving. He just can't do it. He almost THROWS UP (thats what dry-heaving is, for those who don't know. You do the vomit sound, movement and everything, but don't throw up. IT SUCKS)! He makes a circle that looks like it would be used for a ritual. He lights candles and starts chanting.

"Uoy eroda I. Esidarap Tuo-Ekam. Uoy eroda I. Esidarap Tuo-Ekam. Uoy eroda I. Esidarap Tuo-Ekam." Kakashi chants for about an hour.

Then, the moment of truth. He raises the book above his head, chants " Esidarap Tuo-Ekam. Eybdoog." He then throws it into the fire. He screams in agony, and faints. When he wakes up, he says to everyone "I just died a little inside." They help him up. He staggers, but can stand.

"What the HELL, was with that crazy crap?" Naruto interogates.

"I needed to have a proper fare well to my best friend in the whole world." Kakashi replies.

"IT'S A DAMN BOOK!" Kiba shouts.

"SI! ES USTED LOCO?" Ino exclaims.

"At least know, he's in piece. AH, NO I NEED IT!" Kakashi screams.

He grabs it out of the fire and runs it against his face, neglecting the fact that IT'S ON FIRE.

"Kakashi, do you feel a burning sensation on your face?" Tenten asks.

"No, why?" Kakashi replies.

"No reason." Tenten replies to Kakashi's reply.

They spin the bottle again.

It lands on...

**I have a good feeling about this one. I hope it does as good as chapter 5. I thought that would do the worst, but it got 5 reviews in a couple of hours. Remember, 60 percent to kakashi'sdaughte**r**. I know this chapter is kind of, odd, but he's so hooked on the book, I HAD to make it weird. And what he chants is "Make Out Paradise, I adore you." He just says it backwards. REVIEW!**

**_Digital Demon_**


	7. Carnival

**Hello once again. I've been updating frequently, but some people that say "UPDATE SOON PLEASE!" don't review again. PLEASE! I BEG YOU TO REVIEW! I've hit 1350 hits, and only 15 reviews! I know how the hit thing goes but COME ON! I doubt that 15 people alone have visited the story 1300 times. That's 90 times per person! Well, for those people that love the NarutoxHinata pairing, it's gonna happen this chapter, along with some other one's. This dare might be broken down into multiple chapters, since I really need more pairings. The only one in this whole fic is a boy on boy (NejixSasuke). This is kinda like a shot at Humor/Romance, since I need to expand my field. HERE IT COMES!**

**Chapter 8**

It lands on...

Naruto.

"OH YEAH! BELIEVE IT!" Naruto screams.

Just so everyone knows, I know he never really says believe it, he only says it in the American version. I'm more fond of Manga than Anime.

"What?" Sasuke asks.

"I don't know, it's like some force just made me say it, like from a parallel universe." Naruto answers in a confused manner.

Truth or Dare?"

Everyone was thinking of a good dare. Maybe do the S.A.T.s. Maybe the hard questions will make his head explode. Hinata was blushing. She had a dare, but didn't have the courage to say it.

"Uh, Sa-Sakura. I have a dare, but can you say it but say you made it up. It's kind of scary for me to say." Hinata asks shyly.

Hinata whispers in Sakura's ear. She nods and replies "So that's it? It could do some good for you two."

"I dare you to go on a date with Hinata!" Sakura proclaims.

"Uh, sure!" Naruto says cheerfully.

Hinata smiles immediately. She will finally have a shot at her dream date!

"Where'd you like to go Hinata?" Naruto asks in a romantic voice.

"Well, I've always loved the carnival." Hinata replies. This was definitely the best moment of her life.

So everyone heads off to the carnival. They could all smell the love in the air. This was great. They've been in the house for hours, and loved the first inhale of that soothing night air.

This will definitely be a night to remember.

"So me and Hinata are off on our date, you guys go enjoy yourselves." Naruto insisted.

"HOW DO WE KNOW THAT YOU WON'T JUST DITCH HER IN THE MIDDLE OF IT?" Sakura yelled.

"On my honor, I will not ditch Hinata." Naruto says confidently.

"Fine." They all leave to do whatever.

**Hinata and Naruto**

"So Hinata, tell me about yourself." Naruto demands.

"Oh, w-well, I l-love carnivals, movies, that type of stuff. But what I love most is..."

"Hinata, look! It's a crane machine! Want me to get you something?" Naruto asks.

"Sure." Hinata replies, blushing. For once, she actually felt comfortable around Naruto.

"What do you want?"

"That."

Hinata points at a pink giraffe, all the way at the bottom.

Naruto sulks. _It just had to be at the bottom._

Forty minutes later.

"There. Got it." Naruto says, handing the giraffe to Hinata.

"Thank you." Hinata answers in a thankful (duh) tone.

They walk up to a food court, struggling with the rest of the prizes.

**Sakura**

Sakura was sitting on a bench alone with her head down. _Since Sasuke's gay, I have nobody to chase after. _She lifts up her head and sees Sasuke and Neji, tickling each other, skipping down the path while holding hands.

"Is everything alright, Sakura?"

Lee, out of nowhere, is sitting next to Sakura.

"No. Since Sasuke's gay, I have nobody to chase after. It sucks." Sakura responds, bowing her head in disgrace.

"Well, just remember Sakura, I'm always here for you." Lee ensures.

"Lee, if you even think about hooking up with me, you need to at least change your look." Sakura snaps.

Lee looks back and sees a make over shop. It didn't even cross his mind that it was odd for a make over place to be at a carnival. He walked in.

**The Asuma Cell**

"Why don't we go on a ride?" Ino suggests.

"Whatever." Shikamaru responds.

"Don't wanna lose my lunch, ya know, puke." Choji whines.

"I think there would be enough lunch to cover the whole park." Ino whispers to Shikamaru.

"Hm?" Choji lifts his head ou of the potato chip bag he as licking the grease off of.

"Nothing." Ino snaps back.

Choji shrugs and continues licking.

**Sasuke and Neji**

Sasuke and Neji were skipping along the path, holding hands, and singing "TRA LA LA LA LA." This was definitely a sight to behold. Hundreds looked at them with eyes of bewilderment

(Just so everyone knows, I'm not saying gay people do this. I don't like Sasuke and it's become a tradition to make Neji disturbing, and I have to make it as odd as possible for max hilarity).

"So Neji-poo, what do you want to do first?" Sasuke asks romanticly.

"I don't know, Snuggle Bear, what do you want to do?" "Neji-poo" replies in an equally romantic tone.

"I know! Lets go on that!" Sasuke giggles, pointing at the "Tunnel of Love."

"It's perfect!" Neji squeals. They skip happily to the beginning of the line.

**Kiba and Shino**

"Well, this sucks." Kiba pouts.

"True." Shino agree's.

"Well, we might as well make the best of it." Kiba pouts again.

"Of course, but how?" Shino wonders.

"Maybe we can try and score!" Kiba implies.

"You sick pervert, we're like, 13 years old." Shino snarls.

"You know, hook up." Kiba corrects.

"Maybe I can help."

Tenten walks out in front of them.

"You see, I have no date either so, I could try with one of you." Tenten reveals.

"But who?" Shino questions.

"I'll have to say..."

**Kakashi and Gai**

"So Kakashi, how's life been treatin' ya?" Gai asks.

"Fine. It will always be fine if I get to read my book." Kakashi answers, reading his new Make Out Paradise book.

"Well this sure is dull. Bartender, give me a Bloody Mary and a..." Gai pauses, gesturing Kakashi to say what he wants.

"Sparkling water." Kakashi tells the bartender.

"What, come on! Live a little. How about I give you some plain old beer, seeing how you obviously don't like alchohol that much." The bartender suggests.

"Nah."

"COME ON KAKASHI! LIVE A LITTLE!" Gai screams for no reason (he obviously can't hold his alchohol).

"Fine." Kakashi sighs.

"Make that 3 beers."

Asuma and Kurenai walk up to the two rivals.

"HEY GUYS! DID YOU REMEMBER TO TIP THE PINK ELEPHANT?" Gai mumbles, staggering.

"OK, well, we just saw you guys and decided to hang around." Kurenai said.

"Alright, now the fun will really begin!" Kakashi cheers.

**End of Chapter**

**This will mark of a lot of pairings. As you can see, I'm not done with this yet. The Sand Nin will be introduced soon. I'm also going to add a character to go out with the loser of the Tenten choice. I'll also try to sketch Lee's new look. I'm not a great artist, so bear with me.**


	8. Carnival 2

**Sup! That last chapter did some good. I got 3 more reviews, it's on 3 more favorite lists **

**( BUT TWO OF THE PEOPLE THAT PUT IT ON DIDN'T REVIEW! ARGH!). People, what is the trouble of reviewing? I got 500 more hits when chapter 8 went up (not to that chapter alone) and 3 people reviewed. COME ON! Anyway, 54681 is putting out his first fan fiction soon. READ IT! He has great ideas. His is action, not humor, but the main theme is great! And sorry Afrochicken14-NFFR**, **but there will be a gay joke with NejixSasuke joke that has 'stuff.' They don't REALLY DO IT(of course not) but there will be a joke about it.**

**Well, I left some major cliffhangers, so be prepared for..!**

**Chapter 9**

**Hinata and Naruto**

Hinata and Naruto found a table and sat down.

"Thank you for all the prizes Naruto, they're wonderful." Hinata says.

"No problem. I'm having a nice time Hinata." Naruto tells Hinata (who else would he be talking to?).

"Me to. Here comes the waiter." Hinata points out.

The waiter (what food court has a damn waiter?) Goes up to the couple.

"How may I serve you this evening?" The waiter asks politely.

"I'll have the mozzarella sticks." Hinata replies.

"And I'll have some ramen with miso please." Naruto says in an excited tone.

"I'm sorry, but we don't serve ramen here." The waiter states.

"Wh-wh-wh-what d-d-d-d-d-d-d-did y-y-y-you s-s-s-s-say?" Naruto asks menacingly.

"We don't serve ramen here sir." The waiter repeats.

"HOW DARE YOU! YOU FIENDS! THIS IS NO FOOD COURT WITHOUT THE HOLY FOOD OF RAMEN!" ARRGHFALTYUREASWQOOP!" Naruto screams in blind anger.

Naruto go's nuts. He screams, jumps on tables and shouts at the people eating "THIS FOOD IS UNHOLY! IT WAS MADE BY THE HANDS OF ANTI-RAMEN PEOPLE!" After a couple of minutes, he stops.

"Lets go Hinata." Naruto commands.

"Can I have my mozzarella sticks?" Hinata pleads.

"Hold on. GIVE MY GIRLFRIEND HER MOZZARELLA STICKS!" Naruto roars.

"HERE, FREE OF CHARGE! JUST GO!" The waiter begs.

"Hm, that worked out for the best, didn't it Hinata." Naruto says happily.

"Yea, Boyfriend." Hinata smiles, knowing that this is turning out really well.

**The Asuma Cell**

"PLEASE! GIVE ME SOME MORE MONEY FOR COTTON CANDY!" Choji moans.

"NO! You already had 5 of 'em" Shikamaru yells.

"I'm a growing boy!" Choji groans.

"Your supposed to grow up, not sideways." Ino remarks.

"PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Choji begs.

"NO!" Ino yells.

"Wait, only if you go on THAT ride with us."

Shikamaru points to a ride that is pretty much like Topscan. For those who have it named differently or haven't heard of it at all, Topscan is a ride that has a pole that comes from the ground for support, and on top of that pole is a horizontal pole, which has poles jutting out of it that make an asterisk, and on those poles are the seats.

Well, it spins in 3 ways.

1. The big horizontal pole spins.

2. The asterisk spins.

3. THE SEATS SPIN!

It's an instant barf-machine. Thats why I made him go on THIS ride.

Choji gulps.

"Fine." Choji agrees.

**Neji and Sasuke**

"DEEPER, SASUKE DEEPER, DEEEEEPER!" Neji screams.

"I'm trying!" Sasuke responds.

"There, I told you my lip gloss was at the bottom of my purse, silly." Neji says. (Sorry Afrochicken).

"I'm sorry. Well, what know?" Sasuke asks.

"I don't know. Look, it's Gaara!" Neji screams.

"Oh! Hey Garra!" Sasuke yells.

They run over to Garra and his siblings.

"What are you doing here?" Neji asks.

"I don't even remember. Maybe we got wasted again."

"Why don't you hang with us!" Sasuke suggests.

"Whatever." The Sand-Nin say in unison.

**The loser of the Tenten choice**

"I can't believe she left me for Shino. Says she's always been interested in bugs. Phooey!" Kiba mopes.

"Well, I can't believe I'm doing this for another night."

Kiba unzips his pants.

"WAIT, NO! WHAT AM I DOING? I've gotta find a date! Where should I look?"

Kiba turns around and notices a bar for minors (one that doesn't sell alcohol).

"Perfect!"

Kiba walks in and surveys the bar for girls. Eventually he sees one that he'll take a shot at. She had long red hair past her shoulders. She had big blue eyes and wore a sparkling silver top paired with a black skirt that were up to her knees. Kiba gathers up his courage and takes a whack at it (I don't mean whacks the girl in the head).

"Hey. Do you have an alphabet, cause I think heaven is missing airplane." Kiba attempts to hit on.

"What?" The girls asks.

_Crap! I forgot I suck at pick up lines._

"What I meant to say was, would you like to buy me a drink?"

"EXCUSE ME!" She screams.

"No, I'm sorry, I suck at pick up lines. Would you like ME to buy YOU a drink?" Kiba finally says.

"Sure. What's your name?" She inquires.

"Kiba."

"I'm Sachiko."

**Tenten and Shino**

"Well Shino, what would you like to do." Tenten asks.

"I don't know you decide." Shino replies.

"Well first off, I need to see what's under your sunglasses if we're gonna be together." Tenten declares.

"Sure, take 'em off."

Tenten takes off his glasses and under them are...

"More sunglasses?" Tenten sighs.

"Yep." Shino states happily.

"Lets go do something, how about you try to win me a prize at something?" Tenten says excitedly.

"Sure."

**The Jonin**

The Jonin are all sitting at apoker table playing, poker.

"I bet 100." Kakshi states.

"I call." Asuma and Kurenai both say.

"WELL I BET 300, AND RUPERT THE CHICKEN. GO ON RUPERT DON'T BE SHY." You can guess who that is.

"Alright, show your hands." The dealer states.

"So the winner is, Kurenai with a flush."

"YAY!"

"NOOOOO! DON'T TAKE RUPERT AWAY FROM ME! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Gai cries.

"Oh, shut up."

The next hand is dealt.

"KAKASHI. KAKASHI. KAKASHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII. KAAAAAAAKAAAAAAASSSSHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIII."

"WHAT?"

"SHOULD I PLAY THIS HAND?"

Gai shows Kakashi his hand. He has nothing.

"Ya, go and bet 1000 on it." Kakshi tells him.

**Sakura and Lee**

Sakura was sitting on the bench, waiting for Lee.

"Well Sakura, how do I look?"

"Gasp!"

Lee emerges from the store. His hair is cut much shorter amd is spiked. He has a long sleeved, gray shirt on with the phrase "hard as a rock" in big bold letters on the front. He had his bandages still, but he had new, clean ones that covered his whole hand. He had black, loose pants with gold streaks on the side. He even sacrificed his brows. They were MUCH thinner, but not so thin you couldn't see them. He wore the traditional zori (Japanese sandals).

"Lee! You look wonderful!" Sakura exclaimed.

"Thank you. Now, Sakura, will you give me the honor of going out with you?"

**End of Chapter**

**That's suspenseful. Sorry but, no sketch yet! Try to picture it in your head for now. Well, please REVIEW! DO SOMETHING AT LEAST! Like tell a friend to R&R (if they have an account). Anyway, read 54681's story when it comes out! Peace! **

_**Digital Demon **_


	9. Carnival 3

**IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT! LEE'S NEW APPEARANCE HAS BEEN ALTERED! READ THE SAKURA AND ROCK LEE SEGMENT OF CHAPTER 9 TO FIND OUT WHAT THEY ARE! Anyway**, **this is the last carnival chapter. I now think that the story has plenty of pairings. Sorry, no sketch. I want it to be perfect. Not only will it SHOW what Lee's new look is, but it will attract publicity to the forum I will post it in and the story itself. So be patient. **

**Someone complained in a review that its taking to long for the next chappi.** **I have no problem with that as long as you give a comment about the story. Although, it did take a long time. My comp was down for a while so , yea (sorry). I'm getting off track here. Watch out!** **It's..!**

**Chapter 10 (DOUBLE DIGITS BABY!)**

**Hinata and Naruto **

"So Naruto, what should we do next." Hinata inquire.

"Well, the fireworks will start soon. So lets get a good spot. How about the Ferris Wheel?" Naruto suggests.

"Sure."

They get on line for the Ferris Wheel.

"Your talking to me confidently now Hinata, what happened?" Naruto asked.

"Well, I don't know. I guess it's just an effect of tonight." Hinata replies.

They go on the Ferris Wheel and this big romantic aura comes.

"I think we're gonna be at the top, Hinata, like in the romance movies."

"How would you know what happens in them?" Hinata says in a sly manner.

"Uh, I wouldn't. I-I just see the commercials."

The Ferris Wheel keeps rising and rising and eventually... they stop in the back where they have obscured vision.

"You've _got_ to be kidding me." They both say simultaneously.

This completely defeated the purpose of going on the Ferris Wheel. When this happened, Naruto was really sad because not only was the romance gone, which he wanted to use it for something, but Hinata could have just used the Byakugan to watch it, alone, without Naruto, as if he were not there, which would ruin the moment.

"Welllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll, this... is... bad." Naruto states gloomily.

"Not really, BYAKUGAN!" The vanes popped out around Hinata's eyes, and Naruto put his head down. But then, Hinata held Naruto's hand, and he could see the fireworks too.

"Wh-what's happening?" Naruto asked, puzzled.

"I found out not that long ago that if I'm touching another person when I use the Byakugan, they can see through things too. I don't know if all Hyugas get it or if I'm unique, but it's useful." Hinata was blushing since she was holding his hand.

After that, they watched the fireworks, holding hands. Naruto was thinking of going in for the kiss, but he didn't have the courage. But above them, Sasuke and Neji were playing "Kiss the Girl" and giggling in their gay way.

"I just love this song, it's just so awesome." Neji cheers.

"Hey you wanna be the girl this time?" Sasuke asked his "Neji-poo.

"Sure!"

I'd rather not continue from there.

Well, the song encouraged him. He tapped Hinata's shoulder, and he could see the excitement in her eyes (which is like seeing excitement in a piece of paper). They moved in slowly, and kissed each other.

"Aw, so sweet." Sasuke commented, fluttering his eyelashes.

**The Asuma Cell**

"Remind me again how you talked me into this." Choji was putting on the overhead seat (Like on The Hulk at Universal) while sweating from the suspense.

"You go on, we buy you another cotton candy." Shikamaru was shaking with excitement.

"Buuuuuuuuuuttt... no cotton candy if you barf." Ino says sinisterly.

"WHAT! YOU FORGO..."

But Choji was cut off by the sudden whoosh of the ride. Like I said, barf machine. Choji's head was spinning since the start of the ride, and it's 2 and a half minutes long. So he's spinning, and spinning, and spinning... and spinning.

When the ride is done, Shika and Ino are wobbly, but used to sickening rides from their history (that I just made up). Choji, although, was gonna hurl. Even though he spins when he does that expansion thing, he has never spun like that before.

"OH GOD! I'M GONNA LOSE MY LUNCH!" Choji runs to a garbage can.

"How much will he throw up?" Ino smirks.

"I dunno." Shika chuckles.

8 hours later

"HOW MUCH LUNCH DID YOU HAVE?" Ino shrieks.

"Uhhhhh... the usual. 20 pounds of french fries, eight hamburgers, 8 cups of gravy, 4 hot dogs, 3 eggs, 25 10 pound stakes, and ice cream. Oh, and a salad, gotta watch my figure, ya know."

"Yea, sure."

**Kiba and Sachiko**

"So, what do you like, Sachiko?" Kiba asks his date.

"Well, I like beaches, manga (irony), video games, and most of all, dogs!" Sachiko grins.

"Really? Well, I happen to take mine everywhere. Look." Kiba takes Akamaru out of his jacket (in which he was hiding) and shows him to Sachiko.

"AWWW! SO CUTE!!!!" Sachiko embraces the helpless dog, Akamaru squeling for help.

"Why do you carry him around?" Sachiko asks, still suffocating the dog.

"He helps me fight. I'm a Konoha shinobi." Kiba proclaims.

"Really? That's awesome! Are you good?"

"One of the best." Kiba lies.

"WOW! YOUR SOOOOOOOO AWEOME!" Sachiko squels with delight.

"Yea, you have any siblings?" Kiba says, still beaming for the thought of him being the top shinobi.

"Yea, she's a Konoha shinobi too, so I've grown to love them!"

Perfect, Kiba thinks.

**Tenten and Shino**

"Oooooo, so close. Better luck next time, young man." The Owner of The Bell Thing (when you use the hammer to make the block hit the bell) yells.

"Ugh, why can't you win, Shino?" Tenten frowns.

"I'm not trying."

"Why not?"

"I don't want to."

"But I'm your girlfriend!"

"So."

"Fine, goodbye Shino."

Tenten stomped away.

"Finally, back to what I prefer."

Shino walked into an empty alley and unzipped his pants.

**The Jonin**

"POKER, POKER, I LOVE POKER, IT IS SO FUN! ALTHOUGH, THE MAJOR DEBT MAKES ME WANT TO SHOOT MYSELF WITH A GUN!" Gai sings in an Irish drinking song tune.

"Shut up." Kurenai demands. She was serious because she was winning, and aimed to keep it that way.

"I bet 200." Asuma states.

"I GO ALL IN!" Gai yells

"Call." Everyone else says.

All of them have a 4 of a kind except for Gai. He had... a royal flush (best hand).

"WELL, CRAP IN MY PANTS AND CALL ME CHARLIE, I WON! I CAN PAY FOR OPOP THE TREE'S OPERATION!" Gai cheers.

"No way." Everyone else said together.

"YAY! OPOP WILL LIVE!"

**Neji, Sasuke and the Sand-Nin**

"So, when did this gay thing happen?" Temari said, scratching her chin.

"I was dared to kiss Darling, here, and then the magic just boomed." Neji put a hand over his heart.

"OK, thats weird." Kankuro commented.

"Lets just go back to the mansion." Garra suggested.

"Sure." The Gay Lovebirds skipped merrily back to the house.

**Sakura and Lee**

"YES! I WILL, LEE!" Sakura jumped into Lee's arms.

"Wonderful. What shall we do? Want to go to the Cluba de Amor?" Lee asks.

"Sure."

They walk into the club and the pumping music takes affect. Lee and Sakura start dancing with each other, having a good time. Then the slow dance came. To Sakura's surprise, Lee was rather good. His steps were perfect, and his hands gentle. She was very happy. But then, like teacher like student, Lee got wasted, off soda. They still enjoyed themselves, but Lee passed out twice. No exceedingly romantic things happened, but both their lives were changed that night, for the better.

**End of Chapter**

**Next chapter, dares are back. Sorry for the REAALLLYY long gap. My comp was down for a while, sorry. Whenever there's a pause more than a week and I don't say something in my profile, my comp is down. I have a C2 now. If you want to be a staff member, you must have reviewed at least 3 times (so I know who you are) and say you want to be a staff member in your next review. It JUST started, so it only has 1 story (not mine). R&R, and when you do, tell me how I did on romance overall. **

_**Digital Demon**_


	10. Fat Man's Workout

**Hi! The dares are back with a vengeance! Yes, the dares are back, and I think I have a pretty good one for Mr. Marshmallow (guess who that is). I'm experimenting with some more descriptive writing stuff, mainly not saying 'Naruto said.' I'm going to try to replace it like other writers (and some professionals) do. Ex: Naruto responded replaced with the blond haired shinobi responded. Also, since it's humor, I might make the name humorus (like Mr. Marshmallow!) The dares are back in...!**

**Chapter 11**

They all were walking back, reflecting on what had happened. They went up to the door and could here Neji saying "YES, YES, THAT'S RIGHT! GIVE IT TO ME!"

They opened the door (why? I don't know.) And saw the Sand-Nin, Neji, and Sasuke playing Trivial Pursuit. Neji had gotten a question right and was asking for the piece that he had one.

"The author needs to stop doing those jokes." Sakura sighs.

Maybe I will, maybe I wont.

They got the bottle back.

They spun the bottle.

It lands on... (haven't typed that in a while)

Choji.

Choji never bothered to lift his head out potato chip bag.

"Truth or dare?" Asuma asks his pig resembling student.

"Huh, what? Oh, I pick dare." Choji responds, mouth filled with chips.

Everybody thinks hard fo Fatty Mc Fat Fat's dare. They had a blockage of ideas because of the pause between dares. It took about 10 minutes until Hinata shouts out...

"I dare you to make a commercial for a fitness product!"

Usually, she would be booed at for such a sucky dare. But because of Choji's, uh..., "pleasing plumpness," it was quite good.

"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." Choji groans, but willingly gets ready.

Naruto gets his camera back out, everyone gets a chair and go to the workout section of the mansion (they have one cause I said so!).

They all sit down and Choji walks onto the "stage" in green sweat pants and matching green sweatshirt that says "Join the Pleasingly Plump League today!" He tried to smile, but couldn't, movement non-related to food frightened him. He summoned up his courage and walked up to a thing resembling that Chuck Norris fitness thing (Total Gym, I think).

"Do you like being fit? Do you like working out? Well, not only are you stupid, (don't take that offensively, I called myself stupid in that sentence too) but you should also try out My Torture Device, I mean, Slim-O-Matic! It's simple! All you have to do is, uh, wait."

Choji tries to get on, but since he's obviously never used one before, he had no idea what he was doing. Eventually, he got in a sit-up position.

"As you can see, you put your feet here to set yourself up for sit-ups. I'll do some now." Choji

tries to do a sit up, but at about halfway he stops, gasping for air.

"Wait wa-wait. Ugh, wheeze, as you can see, this can turn into an intense workout." Choji gets into position for a bench press.. "Now for this, you just have to push." Choji pushed with all his might, his face turning blood red. After one rep, he stopped, sweat pouring out of his forehead.

"Well, pant, don't take my word for it, just ask these satisfied customers." The Pleasingly Plump Ninja stated.

Naruto gave the camera to his girlfriend (Hinata, if you forgot) and went onscreen. The Kyuubi's container spoke as slow as a 1st grader that was just taught how to read. "I am very saaa-saaaaaa... how do you pronounce that? Oh, satisfied with the Slim-O-Matic Fitness Mashineh. It is very guud. It make's all the ladies love me. Thank you Choji, for this wunderful mashineh." For those who didn't catch it, the misspelled words were how he pronounced them.

Choji was back on screen, trying to hide his potato chip bag so they wouldn't catch him in the middle of the crime. "As you can see, it great! Buy it TODAY!" Then he starts speaking in that really fast voice you here at the end of comercials. "May cause nausea, vomiting, dizziness, heart attack, deafness, blindness, fatigue, and weight gain."

"So, that's it. Alright, who's next." Inquired the pink haired genius.

"Only the bottle will tell." Her rival replies.

They spin the bottle.

It lands on...

**End of Chapter**

**I think I'm loosin' readers! Spread the word please! R&R. I also have a forum now! It's called "Who is Better?" Details in the forum. Don't forget to check out my c2! Peace!**

**_Digital Demon_**


	11. Why Are They Rivals?

**Wazzaap!? I have a new action fic, Naruto: The Seal Is Breaking (URL in profile). It's just a prolog, so don't expect to be saying "OH MY GOD, THAT'S SO AWESOME!!!!", but it's still pretty good (according to 54681). Please R&R, and don't do half that SOMEBODY already did for that story. PLEASE, IF YOU ADD ME OR THE STORY TO YOUR FAV/ALERT LIST, I BEG YOU TO REVIEW! IT'S HAPPENED 9 TIMES! COME ON! Anyway, you can see I urge reviews more than ever because of the "I like the story enough to put it on my fav's but not to take 10 seconds of my life or less to tell the author how I feel" plague. Ok, to the chapter!**

**Chapter 12**

It lands on...

Might Gai.

"Ha Ha! Finally! Time to show you how a _real _man plays this game." The Eye Brow Wonder exclaims.

"Truth or Dare?" Kakashi asked, with a malicious look in his eye (in Gai's point of view).

"Truth! Don't hurt me!"

Everyone gathered in a group to discuss their thoughts on the dare of Lee's mentor, but Kakashi just reminisced on the past of the rivalry that is noticed only by Gai. He eventually came up with this...

"How in the hell did we become rivals in the first place?"

"Ha! Stupid as always, Kakashi. Don't you remember when we, uh... that time when we both, hm. I don't seem to recall how we became rivals. But there had to be something..." Gai responds, scratching his head.

"So your telling me you just woke up one day and you were rivals, out of nowhere?" Tenten asks her sensei.

"No, that can't be it!"

"How could you lie to me like that Gai-Sensei? WAHHHHHHHH!" Lee cries, entering a fetal position.

"Was it that time with the pie and the donkey, everyone screaming_ 'MAZEL TOV!'" _Kakashi suggests.

"No, but we did get so wasted we got in a fist fight." Gai answered

"No, you had an alcohol free drink, _thought_ it had alcohol, and thought you were drunk."

"Oh, ya right, hey maybe it was wh..."

"This is going nowhere fast." Sakura interrupts.

"Well, I'm sorry but I can't seem to recall how this rivalry occurred. Maybe it was something soooooooo bad, it's become a suppressed memory. We need to tap into it!" Gai stands up, and strikes a good guy pose.

So they walk into the therapy room of the mansion (with the problems Neji's got, you can't go wrong with this room). They call a therapist to try and tap into one of their minds. Kakashi went first.

"When I say a word, I want you to say what comes first." The Therapist commands.

"Sure." The Copy Ninja replies.

"Happy."

"Pointless."

"Fighting."

"Pleasure."

"Death."

"Sorrow."

"Might Guy."

"Loser."

"Emo."

"Me."

"Ugly."

"Gai's momma."

"Ok, your done." The Therapist makes a hand gesture and everyone excluding the Jonin rivals gathers into a group.

"I think I now what happened. According to The Therapist's Handbook, the series of answers suggests it might be Code XQFUYNHH1277BKk7GDBJYFU57857GT."

"Which is what?" Asuma asks.

"They had a fight over a girl. If Mr. Might goes as planned, than that's the case." He breaks the group aprt and walks over to Gai who is laying on that couch thing in ALL therapist's offices.

"When I say a word, I want you to say what comes first."

"Alright." Gain responds.

"Happy."

"Beating Kakashi."

"Fighting."

"Something I'm better at than Kakashi."

"Death."

"The Devil's fault. By devil I mean Kakashi."

"Hatake Kakashi."

"Stupid guy that noone likes."

"Emo."

"Sasuke." True Dat.

"Ugly."

"My momma."

"Women."

"Nasty."

An eyebrow raised on everyone's forehead.

"So much gayness in the world." Ino shudders.

"Well, I have no idea anymore. That'll be $4,000,000." The Therapist holds out his hand.

"I think I have some pocket change." Neji reaches into his pocket and takes out $4,000,000 in cash (how it fits, I don't know).

"So we'll never know how it started." Naruto sighs.

"Booooo, bad chapter." Shikamaru whines.

"Oh, wait. NOW I remember." the silver haired shinobi proclaims.

**Flashback**

All the Jonin that are in Konoha now are a lined up shoulder to shoulder. Gai and Kakashi are next to each other.

"Today is a great day in Konoha history. We are gld to accept all of you as Jonin into our army. This is a great honor, for al..."

"Hey, what's your name?" Gain asks Kakashi.

"Hatake Kakashi, yours?"

"Might Gai. You look pretty good, as a fighter, I'm not gay."

"I don't mean to brag, but, I am pretty good."

"If only you didn't look so stupid."

Kakashi casts a death glare. "Well you have freaky eyebrows."

"AH! YOU ARE TRULY EVIL! FROM NOW ON WE SHALL BE RIVALS, AND IT SHALL BE BASED ON A POINT SYSTEM. I JUST GOT 2 POINTS FOR MAKING US RIVALS, AND ANOTHER 1 FOR BEING BETTER LOOKING! BEAT THAT!" Gai hollers.

"Don't want to." Kakashi replied.

"Oooooooo, you are good, but here this, I will surpass you in coolness."

**End of Flashback**

"We should've known it would be something like that." Shino says.

"But Master Gai, if your not gay, but you say girls are nasty, what are you." Neji asks his teacher.

"Simple, I'm a virgin."

Everyone's jaws dropped.

"It all started when..."

"PLEASE, JUST END TYHE CHAPTER WITHOUT SPINNING THE BOTTLE!" Kurenai begs.

**End of Chapter**

**I don't** **_expect this one to be great (but I've been wrong before). PLEASE R&R BOTH STORIES, AND REVIEW IF YOU PUT ONE ON YOUR FAVORITES! I'm not going to abandon this, if that's what your thinking. I will post on both stories. It will just take a little longer to update. See ya!_**

_**Digital Demon**_


	12. YAY! PUPPET SHOW!

**Hola! Please check out my action, next chapter up, you should be pleased (if your not, give me time to change from "Ha Ha!" to "Holy crap, that sounds like it hurts."). Ok, now to _this_ story… Hello again! Once again, I was proved wrong. Last chapter was pretty good. I know the usual readers reviewed, but they all loved it (and I laughed my ass off when I read the review that Tsuchicko wrote about Kakashi being hot). Well, that's the past, back to now, because now is now, and… ROLL CHAPTER (old movie projector clicks on). Here it is! The…**

**12th Chapter**

They spun the bottle.

It lands on…

Kankuro.

"Of course it lands on me, just 20 damn minutes after I arrive." Kankuro whines.

"Truth or Dare?" His female sibling asks sinisterly.

"What? You think I'm a pansy like Gai? Dare me!" The puppeteer proclaims.

Everyone was scratching their chins, thinking of a sufficient dare for the annoying puppet master.

"I'VE GOT IT! I DARE YOU TO PUT ON A PUPPET SHOW FOR SOME KIDS!" Temari exclaims proudly while trying to hold back her laughter.

"I hate you soooooooooo much." Her brother replies (do I have to say which one?).

"O! I HAVE TO BE PART OF IT TO!" Gaara exclaims. Everyone stairs at the brunette killing machine (for some reason, he's a red-head in the anime but a brunette in the manga. Look for him on the back of volume seven).

"Uhhhhh, not that a massive, no hearted, killing machine like me likes that kind of kid stuff, heh heh."

They go to the school part of the mansion (I love making them have everything in that mansion, shoulda put the carnival in the basement T-T). They talk to the teacher about the dare, and that her employer is part of the game, so she let them do it. All of the kids gathered in front of the puppet theater while the teens sat in the back, awaiting what bizarre thing will happen this time (except for Naruto, who was in the group of kids, and the pair of gay lovers that had gone somewhere else without anyone caring). Sakura is the narrator, while Kankuro and Gaara do the puppets.

"Long ago, there was an evil tyrant named Drakunith (I **_SUCK_** at names, making them up at least) that was really meeeaaaan!" Sakura said dramatically. All of the kids booed as Kankuro used the Drakunith puppet to do a "meeeaaaaan" thing to someone (hand puppets, not his usual marrionets).

"DIE DRAKUNITH!!!!" Naruto screams and throws a kunai at Kankuro's hand. It hit it dead on.

"OWWWWWWWW!!!!! YOU SON OF A…" But before he could finish, Sakura smacked him in the back of the head to remind him that kids were there. "Fine, I'll go on." He continued playing with Drakunith doing the "Meeeaaaan" thing (but it looked odd, because he didn't bother to take out the kunai).

"But than, two brave people went to stop him from being so mean! Their names were Silpa and Antrele…" But she was cut off by Gaara.

"NO! I HAVE TO SAVE THE WORLD FROM THE MEANIE!" The teenager that acted 5 years old whined.

"Fine. His name was Gaara." Gaara makes his Gaara puppet walk on stage.

"Psst," Gaara's brother whispers, "How did you get a Gaara puppet?"

"I didn't make it by sewing and other un-killing spree type guy stuff." Gaara says really fast.

"Well, he went to tell Drakunith to stop being mean. But then, he did the meanest thing you could do. He hit Gaara and made him cry!" All the kids boo again. Naruto tries throws another kunai and it hits, again.

"I HATE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!" Kankuro screams, but Sakura does another hit in the back of head gesture, and he shuts up. Kankuro makes his puppet hit Gaara's.

"DON'T HIT ME! AIEEEEEEEEEE!" Gaara screams. He uses his sand coffin to crush his brother's hand.

"ALRIGHT THAT'S IT! AFTER THAT, HE WASN'T MEAN ANYMORE! BYE BYE!" Kankuro ran out of the room

After, a kid called out "HEY, HE TOOK DRAKUNITH! THEY'RE BOTH GONNA BE MEAN TO PEOPLE! GET THEM!" Every kid in the room besides the ninja ran out, resulting in hearing Kankuro's cries for mercy.

They all returned to the living room, where they found Neji and Sasuke.

"What were you guys doing?" Hinata asked.

"We weren't making out, if that's what you were thinking." Sasuke replies rapidly.

"Yes you were." Ino snaps.

"No we weren't, we were playing with blocks." The group looks past the couple and see a bunch of blocks. "Phew." The all say in unison.

Read the next sentence AND the one after it, no matter how bad you think the first is, it will all turn out well.

But than, all of a sudden, they break out kissing, out of nowhere.

"Ugh, what happened! You'rre a bad kisser now Neji, I'm breaking up with you! (HALLELUIEAH)"

"Fine, go on and spin the bottle!"

They spin the bottle.

It lands on…

**YES! THEY BROKE UP! NEJIROCKS AND ILOVEMYNEJIKUN CAN FINALLY REJOICE!!!!!!!!!! Hoorah!. R&R Both stories please. I don't know if anyone here looked at the action, but more than 100 people looked at it in 24 hours, but didn't review. COME ON! It will now take me longer to write these chapters unless i go on a writing spree and type ALOT in one day (and those happen alot). Nothing else to report. ADIOS!**

_**Digital Demon**_


	13. Edumacation

**Hiya! Sorry about the long pause. After I updated my action, I had a mental block. I now have two ideas, so you'll be getting two chapters back to back. First a dare, than a truth (I had the truth idea first, but I wanted to spread them apart since they don't happen as frequently), and something will be revealed when that truth is told... well, something that's actually based on an argument The Incredible Steven(54681) had. ENOUGH CHATTER! IT's..!**

**Chapter **13

It lands on...

Sakura.

"Please be gentle, I'm only girl." Sakura says making a sad face. Meanwhile, the inner Sakura is screaming "YA!!!! FINALLY! BRING IT ON, PASNYS!"

"Ugh, your gonna have to pick truth if you want us to be genle." Sasuke moaned.

"I never said that. I just don't want it to be something like 'Sleep with Naruto' or something like that." Sakura pointed out as Naruto snapped his fingers in dissapointment, "Dare me!"

Everyone "put on their thinking caps" (I don't know if any of your teachers used to say it, but mine used ton say it A LOT) and thought of a dare for the pink haired kunoichi. Eventually, her rival blurted out "I dare you to educate Naruto!"

"YAY! ME WANT BE SMART MAN!" The (because I said so) even stupider Naruto cheered.

"AREN'T YOU SUPPOSEDTO BE SPEAKING SPANISH!???????????" Sakura screams.

"Quizá." Ino replies (It means maybe).

"Anyway, that's an impossible feat. It's like trying to teach a walrus how to touch it's toes. It. Can't. Happen." Sakura insists.

"You also thought I could never be gay." Neji implied.

"No, I thought you were gay the second I saw your room."

"Oh, well you also thought my Sasuke-poo, I mean, that evil Uchiha, could be gay." Neji corrected.

There was pause, which was broken when Sakura said "This is true." So, admitting defeat, they went to the school section of the mansion again, which was vacant because of recess (BECAUSE THEY HAVE A PLAYGROUND TOO!). Sakura set up things to educate the shinobi with the education of a potato. Naruto sat in his desk (which was REALLY small) as Sakura walked in front of the chalkboard with a piece of chalk in her hand. The rest stood in the back.

"Okay, let's start slow. What is 2 plus 2?" Sakura asked.

Naruto scratched his head, a vain bulging from his forehead as he tried to solve the persistent problem that perplexed the pea-braind shinobi thought to be a pest to some particular people.

"After that you can count how man words started with p in that sentence." Sakura added.

"Ugh! These are questions only Albert Einstein could answer!" Naruto whined.

"Just try to answer them."

"But I don't wannaaaa!!!! WaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAa!" The supposedly 13 year old moaned.

"JUST TRY!"

"Ugh, 2 plus 2 equals...COW!" The blonde exclaimed.

"SHUT UP INO!" Sakura screamed (I never said which one).

"Ya, 2 plus 2 equals COW!!" Naruto cheers.

"No, it doesn't." Sakura snaps.

"COW!"

"NO!"

"COW!"

"NO!"

"COW!"

"NO!"

"BULL!" Ino taunts.

"STOP!"

"COW!!!!! COW! COW COW COW COWWWWWWWW!"

"Holy crap, TRANSFORM!" Sakura transformed herself into, a COW!

"Yay! Cow! Now I'll try harder! Ugh, two plus two equals... wait, I know! It's..."

"What?"

"IT'S... BABY COW!"

Sakura slapped her fore head.

"Wait, no. Is it four?" Naruto asks.

"YES! THAT'S RIGHT! GOOD! NOW HOW MANY P's WERE IN THE SENTENCE?" The Cow Lady asked.

"Uh, horse?" Sakura gave him a death glare, "NO! I mean, seven." He quickly corrects.

Sakura smirks, "This could work!" She continues her lessons, which do not go well 3 minutes in when she drops the transformation jutsu.

"NO! I WANT COW! NOW!" Naruto whined, beating on his desk.

"Naruto, stop acting like a four ye..." But she stopped when she saw him take out a baby blanket and a binki.

"... my bad, stop acting like a two year old."

Naruto raised his hand, "Teacher..."

"What?" Sakura asks on the verge of tears.

"I made boom-boom." Naruto points at a large brown spot in his pants.

"Ah, HELL NO!" Sakura begs as she realizes that he took a dump in his pants.

"Interesting. The extreme amount of stress on Narutos brain from being taught by the girl he loves has caused his brain to make him believe he is only 2 years old. Why that would happen, I don't know. But it's pretty funny." Kakashi chuckles.

Sakura had to proceed and change Narutos diaper.

"Why was Naruto already wearing diapers?" Shino asked.

"I dunno." His former girlfriend replied.

So Sakura had to put up with changing Naruto's diapers and obeying his every whim, which included "GIVE ME MY TEDDY!" and "GIVE ME MY RATTLE!" But she drew the line at "I'M THIRSTY! But I DON'T WANT A BA BA!" Try and think of how mothers feed their children without bottles, than you'll get the joke. She slapped him, which made him come back to his senses.

"Hm, what happened?" He asked, caressing the red mark on his cheek.

"Sakura was dared to teach you but the pressure on your brain made you act like a baby resulting in an odd and possibly badly reviewed chapter filled with cows and boom-boom." Hinata said in one breath.

"Oh, whatever."

They spin the bottle.

It lands on...

**End of Chapter**

**Good News! I have started working on the sketch! I'm also drawing other characters that will be in my first flash (when I get it), when I think of a script. While I'm on the subject of flash, please say whether you'd bother to watch this if it were turned into a script for flash. Anyways, this is my last plea for you to read my action. If you did not like the 1st chapter, read on and you'll like it a lot. 54681 didn't like it a lot until chapter 2 so, ya. Okay, enough begging. So Long!**

**_Digital Demon_ **


	14. Jiraiya Dream Hath Come True

**WOO! I'M BACK! Sorry for that pause, everyone. I grew out of fanfics, but now I'm BACK! Expect longer chapters now, cuz I read this story, and the chapters are short…. My 4 chapter action has more words than my 13 chapter comedy (only by 100 words). I aim to stay on track with these, but the series might end soon, cuz Im runnin out of ideas. This chapter is based on a suggestion by Blood, so give credit to him. Well, here we go……………………………. **

**Chapter 14**

It lands on……

The door. Everyone just stares at the door. "So… we spin it again?" Sakura asks.

"Unless someone, such as Tsunade, walks through that very door before I finish this sentan…." But Kakashi was interrupted by Tsunade walking through that very door.

"Woah, how coincidental…." Naruto said.

"What's coincidental?" Tsunade asked.

"Truth or Dare?" Ino asks.

"Truth or… wha?"

"Truth or Dare? You know, the game where you spin the bottle and someone says 'Truth or Dare?' and you answer 'Truth' or 'Dare' and you must do whatever the 'Truth' or 'Dare' is?" Naruto explained (he's the only one that would say it like that).

"Ohhhh…. ok…. Why?"

"Cuz the bottle landed on you." Gai said.

"Oh……………………. Dare."

Everyone had a dare. The worst and most torturous dare yet. But it required Jiraiya. Then Sakura, using her wits thought of a way to summon him. She randomly pulled out a mega-phone and walked over to the window. She then said, "Oh, if only there were some big, strong, 60 or older man that could help me take odd my size D bra."

Instantaneously, Jiraiya was behind Sakura trying to undo her bra. She screamed. Really loud. When Jiraiya realized who it was, he stepped backward and said in a disappointed manner, "Sakura… you tricked me…. You're not a size D. You're not even a C. Hell; do you even NEED a bra?"

Sakura was about to do things too painful for me to say, but Sauske intervened and said, "We need you to help us with a dare for Tsunade."

Jiraiya thought about this and said, "What's ion it for me?" Naruto quickly whispered something in his ear.

Jiraiya than said in an extremely excited voice, "YES! YES! I AGREE! I'LL DO IT! WHEN DO WE START???"

"In about 2 minutes." His student informed.

"AW, COME ON! YOU'RE KILLIN' ME HERE! WHY NOT NOW??? _WHY???????_"

Ignoring Jiraiya, Neji said, "I don't know why he's so excited about this, but you have to stay in a closet with Jiraiya for an hour…. Wearing only a bikini... and you can't drop the genjutu that hides your oldness… agan, I don't know what's so exciting about that…"

Tsunade slowly turned to face Jiraiya, than turned to the others, than back at Jiraiya. "This is one hell of a sacrifice, but as the Hokage, I must take on such a task to uphold the glory of this village."

"I'd worry about finding something to hold up Jiraiya's pants," Rock Lee said, "but anyway… here's you bikini."

Rock Lee handed Tsunade an itsy bitsy, teeny weeny, yellow polka dot bikini..,. that she would wear for the first time today. "Why this one?? It's too small."

"NO IT'S NOT!!! IT'S FINE! IF ANYTHING, IT'S TOO BIG!!! GO CHANGE!!! I THINK I SHOULD GO IN THE BATHROOM WITH HER, TO MAKE SURE SHE USES THAT ONE!"

"That won't be necessary," Tenten said, "She has to change in the closet."

"WHAT!?!?! NO! THAT'S CRA…" But Jiraiya had already dragged Tsunade into the closet. "START TIMIMNG NOW!! I WANT TO BE IN HERE FOR THE SHORTEST AMOUNT OF TIME POSSIBLE!!"

Several minutes passed, but no noise could be heard. "You think she's even taken her clothes off to change yet?" Kiba asked, and was answered by a shriek of delight from Jiraiya, a shriek of despair from Tsunade, and a very loud slap to the face. "Oh, ok… now she did."

For the next twenty minutes or so, the only noises heard where cries of delight, small giggles, and slaps to the face. But than came Jiraiya's voice saying…

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO! NO! NO! NO! WHY COULDN'T IT'VE BEEN ME? WHY!!!!!!!??????"

"What happened?" Sakura asked.

"The light went out…." said Tsunade in a relieved voice.

Another 30 minutes had passed when…"Jiraiya, stop poking me. It's annoying."

"What are you talking about? You broke all of my fingers a while ago. I can't poke you…"

"Than what are you…. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LET ME OUT! I

DON'T CARE IF I LOSE THE DARE!!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T CARE IF IM' KILLED!!!!! LET ME OUT!!!!!!!!!!"

"No, stay strong Tsunade! You only have to stay in for 3 more minutes."

"Yea Tsunade, stay strong…." Jiraiya said dreamily.

"DON'T TOUCH MY HAIR!" A slap as loud as an explosion was heard.

"I think you broke all the bones in my face…. No matter… I can still imagine what you look like."

20 seconds…

"HE'S POKING ME AGAIN!"

10 seconds…

"LET ME OUT!!!"

30 seconds….

"NO FAIR, THE AUTHOR CHEATED…"

Time Over.

"YES NOW I CAN GET OUT!!!" But to Tsunade's extreme disappointment… "THE DOOR'S STUCK!!!!!"

"Can't you just break it down?" Asuma asks.

"And ruin such a beautifully crafted oak door? NEVER!"

"Than you'll be in the closet with Jiraiya until you starve to death." Kakashi said.

"That couldn't be as bad as taking this wondrously lovely door out of existence."

"Which will take around 2 weeks." Sakura added.

Dust and bits of wood flew through the air as Tsunade bashed through the door.

"What happened to 'that couldn't be as bad as taking this wondrously lovely door out of existence'?" Kurenai asked.

"Urge to cause dramatic tension."

WHO WILL BE THE NEXT PERSON TO BE DARED? WILL IT BE ASUMA, KURENAI, OR EVEN JIRAIYA????? FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGONBA…. I MEAN, NARUTO TRUTH OR DARE: EDITION 50!!!!

**I put in that oak door bit to get to 1000 words. Didn't work. Expect to see more chapters. If I get at least 2 reviews, than I'll be surely motivated for another chapter. I'll probably make one even if it goes reviewless, but reviews will speed up the process.**


	15. NO POKEY FOR YOU!

**It's been a whole year since I started this story, and frankly, I thought I'd be further in. I thought I'd even be done by a years time, but I'm not too close to that milestone… But that's because 7 of those 12 months, I was inactive with writing……… But thanks to all that have stayed loyal throughout this year and reviewed most or even all of my chapters, such as Afro-Chicken, who transformed himself/herself into Afro-Hawk. As for this chapter, if Itachi is your favorite character, like he is mine, than read without hesitation, cuz it's…**

**Chapter 15**

They spin the bottle. It lands on…

Jiraiya.

"Dare." He says blankly.

"I dare you to go in the closet with Tsunade for an hour and you can only where your underwear!" Naruto yelled, which resulted in everyone having a visual image of Jiraiya with only underwear on (including y'all that read my stoof).

"BE SERIOUS NARUTO!" Sakura screamed. On the corner, Tsunade could be seen in a fettle position, probably as a result of a cloth less Jiraiya.

"All this thinking is making me hungry." Choji said.

"Everything makes you hungry." Shikamaru said.

"Shut up! Would anyone like some delicious _pokey_ (Itachi's favorite food) as brain food?" Just as the word pokey left Choji's mouth, a faint yell could be heard, and as soon as he finished the sentence, the yell could be heard full well.

"What the hell? That sounds like…"

Itachi burst though the floor, sending rubble, debris, and pokey through the air. But not a single cookie touch the ground, for Itachi caught them all. As the dust cleared, Itachi could be seen munching on the irresistible food.

"Did he bust through to the third floor with his face?" Neji said, aghast.

"So what? Itachi does stuff twice as hardcore everyday." Asuma said.

"But the floors/ceilings of this house are made of concrete, which is reinforced by steel, which is reinforced by lava, which is reinforced by glass, which is reinforced by wood."

At that moment, Itachi looked back at the others. His face was covered in blood, shards of glass, burns, wood chips, and cookie crumbs.

"They're made like that for security purposes… and he broke through two floors of it… and the wall he needed to break to get inside."

Than Sasuke realized, the person he wishes to be dead, is in front of him, distracted by pokey. So… "DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Sasuke runs at him with rage in his eyes and strength in his soul. But when he came within 3 feet of Itachi, the clan killer stared at him. The scariest and most deadly stare a person could ever stare. Sasuke stopped dead in his tracks… and started to cry.

With that sorry, sorry reaction to a stupid stare, Shikamaru thought of a dare with his superior intellect. "I dare you, Jiraiya, to steal a pokey from Itachi."

"That's not fair! That's definitely the most lethal dare anyone has ever thought of! Why not kill off someone more disposable, like Kurenai?"

"BECAUSE THE BOTTLE LANDED ON YOU, YOU OLD BASTARD!" Kurenai screamed.

"Calm down. He's just stating what everyone wants to happen but never will." Kakashi said lazily, which caused Kurenai to go even crazier.

"Everyone, quiet! Jiraiya's making his first move." Like Tenten said, Jiraiya was sneaking behind Itachi… which didn't work because of his wood sandals. Itachi slowly turned his head 180 degrees, like some sick, clan-killing, pokey eating owl, to face Jiraiya.

Itachi locked his gaze onto Jiraiya's face. Jiraiya stood there, as motionless as the eyes that stared at him, for 20 minutes. 20 excruciatingly long minutes. After the said amount of time, Itachi continued to eat the pokey. But Jiraiya did not move. After 5 minutes, he said "I think his stare made my heart stop."

"Don't be a pansy, try again!" Ino shrieked. Taking off his sandals first, Jiraiya tried to steal another cookie. But when Itachi felt the breath of the old man on his neck, he shrieked so high pitched and loud it could've been mistaken for a bat. Jiraiya fell backward and fell through the hole Itachi made.

Everyone looked to see if he was okay. "First off," Jiraiya moaned, "my heart probably stopped again, because I'm not bleeding too much. Second… I need to think of another way to get the pokey." After Jiraiya got back up to the room, he summoned a small frog. He put it in his hand and said, "Hey Itachi. I can see you still got that pokey of yours. I'm sure its good and all, but I have a frog. See the frog? You like it? Wanna trade it for a cookie.

Itachi twirled his head around and stared at the frog for no more than a second. It exploded. So, just to make a mental picture of Neji's room… it's pink and frilly, has puke covered hello kitty things, a hole in the floor, debris everywhere, and frog blood/innards/limbs. I just wanted to make sure everyone knew what it looked like.

ATTEMPT NUMBER TWO!

"YOU NOT HUNGRY FOR POKEY! YOU HUNGRY FOR HAWT PAWKETZ!"

Itachi slapped him away like a ragdoll (this is just a stupid joke I put in for myself. If you don't get it, than I won't be surprised.)

ATTEMPT NUMBER THREE!

Jiraiya started yelling in an excited voice, "HEY ITACHI! I JUST GOT THIS REEEAAAALLLLLLY COOL NEW SNACK. IT'S SO DELICIOUS AND PRETTY AND AWESOME. IT COSTS LIKE, A BAFILLION DOLLARS, BUT I'LL LET YOU HAVE IT FOR ONE POKEY." Itachi did not answer, "COME ON ITACHI, ALL'S I NEED IS ONE STUPID COOKIE."

Itachi looked up at Jiraiya, and screamed "ONE _STUPID_ COOKIE????!!!!" so loud that Jiraiya's eardrums almost exploded and the house almost collapsed. Five seconds later, Itachi was eating his pokey, and Jiraiya was down the hole with his arms and legs tucked into his body like a turtle does with his shell.

"I hate you Shikamaru….. Tsunade, can you heal me so I can get on with the dare? Do it quick, because I think my elbow is dangerously close to my large intestine." Tsunade, with the help of Sakura, healed Jiraiya.

ATTEMPT NUMBER FOUR!

"Okay, no more fooling around! Time to take it by force! NOW TO CALL FOR SOME BACKUP!!!!!!!!!" Jiraiya executed the summoning jutsu and a toad as large as Itachi apeared. "Go steal a pokey from that fiend!"

The toad faced Itachi and said in a deep voice, "Hand over the cookie so I may give it to Jiraiya as he commands." Itachi ignored him. "Don't make me take it by force…"

"You know what goes great with pokey?" Itachi said menacingly.

"What?" The toad responded in an uneasy tone.

Itachi turned is head and whispered, "Frog soup."

The toad looked frightened, but he stood his ground and said, "Try me…"

**1 billionth of a millisecond later…**

"This is one big bowl of frog soup. I hope I have enough pokey to go with it." Itachi said casually. Jiraiya looked like he was going to cry. "That was the coolest toad… as an act of vengeance to the soupafacation to Gerald Gudvenchinbeganbundasthlepn the Third, I SHALL GET THAT COOKIE! THE NEXT ATTEMPT SHALL BE MY FIERCEST YET!

ATTEMPT NUMBER FIVE!!!!!!!!!!1

"Please gimmie a cookie," Jiraiya sobbed, "this whole ordeal has been TERRIBLE! Just gimmie a cookie! One little itty bitty cookie! PLEASE! I'll be your best friend." Itachi looked at Jiraiya. There was a look in his eyes. It was not hate or maliciousness, it was LOVE!

"You'll really be my best fwend?" Itachi said in a babyish way.

"Uhhhh….. Yea…" Itachi said confuzzledly.

Itachi smiled and said, "You're pathetic. Go die. Just to end this foolishness, I shall sacrifice a pokey. If you treat it bad, than I'll make sure that your perverted eyes never see another girl in a bikini again."

"DON'T EVEN SUGGEST THAT! Ohhh….. the dare is done…"

They spin the bottle….

END!!!!!!!!

**I think this was one of the better chapters. But that's just me, so…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………… Blah. I would've had this story up by the 28****th****, which was when I planned to post it since it's the story's anniversary. But my sister was on a lot, and I finally found something that I lost not too long ago. I think they call it a life (I wasn't very outside active as I should've been when I started the story, but at least I admit it...). Pitch ideas in our reviews, because the ideas aren't come as fast as I had hoped… If I have an idea, I can do a lot. Every single one of these chapters is just an idea that I had that evolved as I wrote on. **


	16. Drink Up! It's Good For You!

**I'm an Asshole. I give everyone that enjoys reading this fic to kick me straight in the testicles so many times; my kids will come out more messed up than the 8-limbed Indian baby. I am the worst hypocrite in the world with updating… **

**Chapter 16**

It lands on… Gaara.

"How in the hell can we think up a dare for Gaara? I mean, come ON! Look at him!" Temari points at her siblings face. His blank stare that will pierce through your soul stayed… forever. "He's had that look on since he was born. The only thing that changes his face is killing. This chapter isn't worth the author's procrastination…"

"Wait!" Kankuro jumped up with excitement spread across his face. "I dare you," Kankuro started as if he revealing an evil plan, "to drink a most vile and disgusting substance. A substance that consists of lettuce, cabbage, ball sack, carrots, and other vegetables. All of these ingredients will be put into a blender and form into a 'liquid'. But this liquid is just BARELY on the line of solid and liquid. Although it is supposed to be healthy, it is one of the most DEADLY objects in the world. But where will we find such a concoction?"

"Found some!" Neji pulled out a container of… V8 vegetable juice. "Its nice and expired too. To give it that extra chunky taste."

I swear to you on my LIFE that several things from this point on are true. I generally like V8 stuff, but this was just disgusting.

Neji held the bottle out and gave it to Gaara. He inspected it carefully. He noticed that its pastiness was cached onto the side of the bottle (true). He shook the bottle. The substance did not move from its place (not true). He poured it into his cup. It moved slowly toward the hole. It poured out in a perfect circle and plopped into his cup. He smelled the drink of death. It smelt like a skunk marinated in crap that was left in the back of the the fridge for 5 years between two blocks of Limburger cheese.

"Are you honestly trying to kill me?" Gaara said sternly.

"I didn't ask that question and I had to steal a stupid frikin' cookie…" Jiraia said plainly.

"STUPID COOKIE?"

"Oh, wow. Look at the time. I gotta go." Jiraiya bolted at the door with Itachi behind him in a cliché cartoony way.

"You must drink it. It's a dare. Everyone else has done what they were told. Now its you're turn." Naruto said.

Gaara turned his cup over. "I'm not doing it." His soul tearing stare escalated to soul-wrenching-at-slow-painful-rate. The V8 hit the floor and seeped into the carpet. Gaara rubbed the carpet to feel the texture. "It feels like toothpaste mixed with sand. (true) I refuse to drink."

"How about this," Sakura started, "Kankuro will put on another puppet show if you do."

"WHAT? I NEVER SA…"

"Deal." Gaara immediately poured another glass of the juice. He tilted his head back. The V8 slid down the back of his throat, chunk by chunk. At one point, it stayed in one spot because of its high viscosity. But before long, it was done. He still had the same blank stare. But he twitched.

"That's it? A twitch? I would rather have some eighty year old hobo take a dump in my mouth."

"Shut up.It's done. Puppet show."

"NO! I WILL NOT DO ANOTHER…"

"PUPPET SHOW NOW!!!!!" Gaara shrieked so high that the local dog's ears asploded.

"Holy crap, fine…" Kankuro went downstairs and was followed by a skipping Gaara. 10 minutes later, Kankuro's hand was once again crushed and cut.

"Just like this chapter, my life sucks."

**Bad chapter. I mainly wrote it as a sign that I will update ATLEAST one more time. And to warn all those out there about Vegetable juice.**


End file.
